is an offense
waiting to happen
it doesn't matter what type of relationship, whether it's with my spouse, my children, my friends, my co-workers, my parents, my in-laws...
if i have unrealistic, unreasonable, or most often in my case unSPOKEN expectations...
i am setting everyone up for failure.
in order to have fruitful relationships i must measure my own expectations. what are my children actually capable of in this situation? have i voiced my expectation to my husband? am i being realistic about so-and-so or such-and-such?
this places the people i love in an impossible position, where they will never be able to meet my standards.
and i set myself up to be offended and disappointed.
conversely, if i can take a few moments to figure out if my expectations are realistic, reasonable and then explain my expectations (and discuss them, being open to adjusting them) i will put my loved ones in a position to succeed!
and i set myself up to encourage and support and praise...which creates an environment (a relationship) full of peace and joy and love.
expectations can be a very good thing.
but out of control expectations will bring disconnect every single time.